Breaking through?

Someone is actually becoming a sort of chatterbox in his own sort of way. Our little man it seems is making up for lost time lately. He won't stop chattering. Of course his language skills are still way below the level of his peers but at least he's verbalising! One woman said in the supermarket recently "he has a funny little accent" which naturally made my mom say "oh he's French," which is her annoying, little grammy brag thing (p.s. I hate saying that...I never say it unless there is a reason like the person is French themselves --must.get.her.to.stop.this.) Besides it was not at all an accent she was noticing but his little speech problem brought on by his late talking, unless of course she's a sort of Pickering or Professor Higgins who can spot accents by regions. I think she was trying to pinpoint his bizarre way of speaking. But like I said I'm pleased for him because he's on the path to normal speech and he's communicating. Even a supermarket customer heard him chattering!

The last day of school in Mexico Little S's teachers gave me a collection of recorded cds with movies they had done of him showing him doing things like staring off in space and not paying attention. They also gave us a letter describing what problems they've noticed over the past session, --he seems to be in his little world etc etc. I smiled and thanked them, tucking the things in my bag and saying to myself "cool because I have dvd's of my son at school and no one else has that!" but knowing full well that he is fine and I would probably be canceling the appointment with the specialist we have scheduled for him in August. I'm really nervous that the appointment will stir up trouble where there is none.

It's really frightening when your son's teachers tell you they think he has a problem. This fear has enveloped me for the months ever since that parent/teacher's conference. I should have just shook my head and gone on with things but I spent way too much time Googling all the symptoms they spoke about and making myself a nervous wreck. Thank God for my friend Sara and her voice of reason. I know if I didn't have her there with her French boy and his similar speech problems our last few weeks I wouldn't have calmed down and let it all go. I have let it all go and since then, magically it's started to all go away because he is ever so slowly improving. Sarah and I talked for hours on end at the park and we both agreed that from the Mexican Directrice's perspective our boys seem mentally challenged but really much of her observations can be attributed to second and third language environmental hazards. The boys look lost because they are! It's a completely foreign environment for them. The other multi-linguals in the school that they are constantly compared to are girls and it is common knowledge that girls are linguistically stronger than boys, especially in the younger years.

I was half joking when I mentioned the word breakthough. He still has far to go before he's at the same level as a typical boy his age. I took him to story time at our local library (lie-bee) and saw firsthand what the teachers at his school meant when they talked about the staring off in the opposite direction episodes. While there was a lot of animation by the story reader and the other kids, Little S was turned completely around for most of the time. He was continually staring at the far entrance where adults were checking out books oblivious to the story and the puppets and the five other kids in the intimate story time group. This shocked me at first because I know he loves books and it was all very fun and interesting. The story reader noticed it too and kept trying to engage him more by asking him what he thought of this or that part or the book. He would turn at my prompting and answer her with a glance, follow along for maybe a minute or two and then drift back to staring at the opposite wall. Definitely unusual but maybe there is a reason who knows.

Afterwards as he played in the library's common room some bigger kids near aged six or seven commented on his funny speech and questioned it by asking their mom "what did he say?". It wasn't mocking really, just some curious observation I guess on their part but it struck me that he cannot be readily understood by his peers. Sometimes he uses an odd word or mixes languages and sometimes he just can't be understood because his speech level is at about the level of a two year old, which is not what you expect from a near four year old so I think it throws people. I was pleased though to see him blend in with these boys and not be a wallflower, but still a little concerned when he grunted this primal "grrrrr" of frustration when they stole his toy or annoyed him. I know this "grrr" thing is his upset over lack of access to proper words and I hope it won't cause him any problems at school when he starts back in September. This is where the tantrums come in.

Taking him into an English speaking environment with other kids was a great way for me to see where he needs help. I have never had this opportunity because he's always been in groups where I too spoke the native language badly and I couldn't readily tune into the communication gaps or the cultural language and eye contact. When it isn't your native language you just don't see that sort of thing without really looking closely for it. I think I'll learn a lot over these next few weeks with my observations of my little chimp Jane Goodall style. I'll be making lots of mental library notes as he plays around these groups of kids in my native tounge.

I'm not sure if he's improving very quickly but I see changes in him!