I hope everyone had a nice Christmas. I wanted to do a Christmas post and show off my enormous Christmas tree but things were chaotic last week. I was sick again.
At first we were to stay at home but we ended up going to my in-laws after a bunch of last minute badgering on the part of mil who called in pepére (grandpa) for reinforcement. I had told Seb from the getgo that going or not going was up to him since I didn't want to be the sort of wife who makes her husband choose, and to be honest I'm not really angry anymore at the in-laws just disappointed. I said my peace and I actually feel better about things. At least they know how I feel now.
Mother-in-law was actually pretty nice to me considering our argument from a few months ago. Charlotte was teething and I had a sinus infection (again, sigh) and she was really helpful and understanding. It was a difficult two days but in spite of it all we had a nice time. My only pet peeves were all centered on the gift exchange which is just poorly planned. It's chaos I'm sorry. They aren't used to exchanging gifts so the gift exchange thing with the kids is all new territory and they don't plan it well so kids are tearing open presents right and left. They have no idea what they're doing and the kids end up opening everyone's gifts not knowing what's what. And that brings up my other peeve of the gift choices. It's a plastic extravaganza! They buy all the cheapest crappiest toys. I wish mil would ask me what the kids like. For what she spends on three gifts they could have one small gift each. She knows this because I've pretty much told her, delicately ´dancing around the fact that the kids have enough toys and they only really need books and things that grow as part of a collection like Lego or Playmobil. And there is now the space issue because we really have no room for any more toys. I know they're excited about buying but it's just waste. All the crap toys last a few months and then they end up in the garbage. I know she thinks I'm a big meanie for not letting her spoil her grandkids but she needs to come to her senses. The toys never last more than three falls down the steps and they're taking over our house!
We went the abbey St. Etienne in Caen for Christmas Eve mass which was really pretty then afterwards we went to sil and bil's for a huge feast. Bil is an excellent cook and he made all these fun surprises like escargot/bacon appetizers, and he had us clearing the palate midmeal with a camembert sorbet he concocted, yum. He's a fun cook. Me I gorged on oysters. I love oysters and I think I ate over a dozen by myself. We ate like kings as only the French can do at Christmas. I did the desserts, a traditional Buche de Noel and an amaretto cheesecake. Both were really good but everyone was so full they hardly noticed. I could barely eat half of a piece of cheesecake and it killed me. It takes so long to make!
Then at midnight my neice and nephew opened gifts and we watched. It's not our tradition to open gifts at midnight so we didn't participate and I had their gifts saved for later because I have remembered the chaos of their midnight gift unwrapping. One thing that bugs me about exchanging gifts for the kids is sil tells the kids that *all* gifts come from santa and it's really annoying. I don't need them to thank me but I think it's unhealthy for them to think gifts essentially fall from the sky. My kids get two token Santa gifts and they're from me and Seb. The gifts from the family are from the family and they are expected to thank them for the gifts. Because we're with the in laws celebrating Christmas we have to end up telling S that all his gifts from them are from Santa and I hate that. I left all his gifts from my side of the family at home for this reason. I don't like the Santa thing all that much anyway, we are borderline into it, but this nonsense of the kids thinking everything is from Santa boils my blood. The next day the gifts we bought got tossed in the "Santa pile" with little thanks from anyone for all the thought we put into choosing them. Later in the afternoon I picked up one of the gifts and looked at it, studying the box and my six year old niece came up next to me,"Santa brought me that one! He knows I like Playmobil!" I sighed. It just all seemed kind of warped to me that she is at an age where she could express her pleasure for something but had no tangible idea where it came from.
I'm not a grinch but there is a limit.
8 comments:
ah, christmas! except for children, i don't know of anybody who actually enjoys it...i mean, if they weren't related to you, would you ever really want to see the relatives?! oh, no, no, no, this is the WRONG attitude. ok, i'll work on that. happy new year, though!
We also saw the All Gifts Come from Santa thing this year, which got me to wondering how are we going to juggle this one in the future. I agree wholeheartedly, especially since I have always seen Christmas as a time to teach children about the spirit of giving and charity. The art of thoughtful gift giving really is something learned, as well as learning to be thankful and to express your thanks to the people who give to you.
I'm with you on the Santa thing. We don't make it a big deal for my kids and it makes me crazy to hear all that "Santa is watching" crap. We do talk about Santa but don't make it a big deal and our kids figure out pretty early that he's not real and we're all OK with it. We, also, have too many crappy plastic toys which will be going to Goodwill in the coming weeks.
I've never heard of the "all things come from Santa" thing before, but it would drive me mad, too. I actually sit there with a photo album to make sure that Sophia knows who's giving her a gift.
And I really want to tell my mother that if she goes by the $1 section of the store to please not buy anything for me or the kids, but I haven't figured out a polite way to do it, yet. I keep wish lists on Amazon for everyone and she still doesn't use it. Instead, she also buys the cheap toy that will be broken in a couple of days. Oh well!
P.S. I really wanted to do the Christmas Angel thing, but she wasn't acting like an angel at the time (I think it was the chicken pox), and now I fear it's too late.....
We do Santa. I love Santa. I also LOVE Christmas. (So there you go, Jadie, now you know of a thirty-year-old who love-love-LOVES Christmas!) But no way do we do opening gifts on Christmas Eve or all the gifts being from Santa. The stocking gifts are from Santa and then a few toys and everything else is from who it's from so the appropriate person can be thanked and my son understands that Christmas is about sharing and generosity and thinking of others. Mainly for us, Christmas is about the family being together. That's the big thing, especially with our family so spread out.
It's hard when you have to spend the holidays with people who have totally different traditions than yours. So disappointing. But at least they weren't nasty to you. That would have been awful, especially with you not feeling so well. Maybe you could do Christmas in Florida next year? I know it's expensive to fly that time of year, but I love seeing all my family around the holidays. It makes it so worth it.
As for the plastic gifts, I agree. My parents are great but they do tend to pick up the plastic gifts at the last minute. We have all these plastic farm sets and trains (the train they got this year was already broken before it was completely out of the packaging). "But he loves it!" they say, and it's true, he does. So I just shrug.
Actually I must agree that S LOVES the plastic stuff too. He isn't aware there is a difference and that it won't be around in six months. And besides I don't ever buy him these things so of course he loves the instant gratification of it. I have to say the dollar store has some pretty awesome stuff sometimes too. You just have to be a good picker! I think my sister does a good job because she often finds Thomas themed toys and once even found Thomas Legos. And a few friends find cool stuff like hey Lucy! The kids still play with the little mini gas stove you gave Little S a long, long time ago :) but mill is NOT a good picker. No way! This year we have a GIANT Barbie doll sized Helicopter (barbie could fit in it!), a GIANT matching firetrck, a police car and a police motorcycle. Just to give you an idea ALL FOUR PIECES were sold in a package deal together for 39.99 euros (written on the box). The helicopter blades are already busted (nephew did that ten minutes after it was opened, grumble) Anyway I think for that price mil could have chosen something more durable and smaller!
This is delicate to write about because it sounds like I'm being ungrateful for their gifts. I'm grateful but the wasted money really bugs me and the kids not thanking people REALLY bugs me.
By the way the Santa gifts we put out were wrapped in brown paper and tied with string! We put all thee funny stamps on them and wrote S´s name in block letters and then we wrote FRANCE really big on them. He saw them right away!! I think this will be our new tradition for the Santa gifts because they looked really mysterious! The truth was that we didn't have any wrapping paper but it worked out really well.
Hmm, now I'm trying to remember how DH's family does Santa. I *think* they specify Santa gifts vs. family gifts, though Santa distributes them. They also open on Christmas Eve. That part doesn't bother me so much, since our family did both (Eve was for one set of family, 3am was for Santa, and Christmas Day for the remainder of the extended family). DD is too young to understand the whole thing anyway, so I'm not too worried yet. For me, Christmas is celebrating with others, so it was kind of hard this year since we were on our own. We did Christmas Eve with friends but Christmas Day by ourselves and that was rough on me...I want DD to be able to play with her cousins (all too far away to visit easily on the holidays). I like your way of decorating Santa gifts. I may steal that idea for next year.
I hear you on the plastic toys. We didn't get *that* much, but we do get some and I end up getting rid of most. And my mom always sends me stuff that ends up at Goodwill. I hate it, but can't convince her to stop sending the stuff.
The playing with the cousins was wonderful for Little S. I guess that's the exchange of having to deal with the giving up Christmas.
Btw our brown paper was all crinkled because it was stuffing from our moving boxes! Anyway since plain brown paper is hard to come by I´m saving it for next year when I do come across it.
Post a Comment